I didn't even get a sticker...

I've been for my blood tests this morning.

They took 4 vials of blood. With the third one, I actually heard the blood hitting the bottom of the bottle.

Not nice.

I asked for a sticker because I'd been brave, but wasn't allowed one.

I suppose I should learn to just suck it up - it's bound to get a lot worse from here on in!!


Tweet tweet!

I just joined twitter... I'm not entirely sure why, and I'm not sure that I'll use it, but if you want to follow me, I'm @Mrs_Bernie

Not that there's anything to see right now...!


Actual Outcome

So after a 45 minute wait at the surgery we finally got to see the doc yesterday.

I was petrified that she was going to laugh me out of the door, but as it happened my weight wasn't mentioned at all.

I have to go back for blood tests on Monday to test my Rubella status / hepatitis / AIDS and all that jazz.
She's said it's pointless trying to do a day 21 blood test, because how would we possibly begin to fathom where my day 21 is!?

Mr B has also booked another appointment to see her so that she can refer him for SA (sperm analysis) and he's going to see her on Saturday.

She said that the SA referral can be about 4/5 weeks, and the same again for getting the results back. Once all the results are back, we'll go from there. If the SA is all ok, it'll be a local gynea referral for lap and dye and clomid, if not a referral to a fertility clinic.

I feel really, really positive about it all. I feel like the ball has FINALLY started rolling, and because of that, I need to start properly sticking with the diet.

I feel like this is it, now - although the weight wasn't mentioned yesterday, it's going to be an issue somewhere down the line.

So, my target is to lose 8lbs by December 16th. That will be a total lost of 2stone.

I'm on it, like a car bonnet!!


Desired Outcome...

I can't help thinking about the Drs appointment we have this afternoon.

I'm trying not to, but it's looming ever closer and I'm getting progressively more nervous about it.

The truth is, I'm pretty scared that they're going to laugh in my face and tell me I'm too fat for anything.

I was talking to Mr B last night about what we'd like to get out of today's appointment.

We decided that we would like to get a referral to a fertility clinic, even if it is a way off in the future, with a weight loss target driven by them.

So, it would be great for them to say "we'll make you an appointment for May, but you need to lose at least 3 stone by then".

I think that will really motivate me.

I'm all about the deadlines, and if I know I've got an immoveable (is that even a word?!) one on the horizon, it'll keep me on track.

I'll let you know the actual outcome of the appointment later...

Wishes for the Fountain

It's not hard to guess what I was wishing for.

I've said before that I found the Trevi Fountain quite emotional - all those people throwing their hopes, dreams and coins into the fountain.


Doctor Doctor...

Mr B and I are going to the doctors on Tuesday to talk about TTC and how it's not really happening for us.

I'm a bit nervous.

Actually, that's a massive understatement.

I'm petrified.

It feels like, by going to the doctors, we're admitting that we're a failure.

I'm lucky that I was diagnosed a long time ago, so I've known for more than 10 years that having a baby wasn't going to be easy. But I suppose I haven't really believed until now. Until we're having to ask for help doing the thing that should be one of the most natural things.

Rome - St Peter's Square and Basilica

We went to the Basilica on our first afternoon.

We ended up going right to the top of the dome by accident. We started up a flight of stairs that, once we started, we couldn't turn round. There were over 300 of the damn steps - I don't like heights or enclosed spaces, so had a panic attack halfway up and couldn't appreciate the views.



Rome - Trevi Fountain

I found the Trevi Fountain really emotional.

People throw in coins and make a wish.

We sat and watched a few people throw their wishes to the fountain (and made some of our own, too) and it was just really sad.

Rome - The Food

We ate some DELICIOUS food while we were in Rome.

My favourite, by far, was the Taglietelle with Salmon that I had for dinner on Monday (top right).

It was like angels dancing on my taste buds!!


I'm back!

Mr B and I are back from a lovely weekend in Rome to celebrate our anniversary.

It was nice to get away, but tiring as we had so much to do in such a short space of time.

I will update you with my tales - probably in photo form - soon!


2 Years Ago...

I can't believe two years have already passed since Mr B and I said "I do".

Where has the time gone?! It feels like only yesterday.

I love you, Mr B.

Happy anniversary


Off the Wagon...

So I seem to have fallen spectacularly off the dieting wagon.

For some reason this week (and last week. And the week before that, if I'm honest!) I haven't really had the motivation to stick to the diet.

I haven't been to the gym for weeks and just can't seem to get my arse in gear.

I did, however, buy some new trainers at the weekend. In fact, Mr B bought them for me. They were a birthday present. A long overdue birthday present, considering my birthday was back in March, but whatever!

I think it's because I know I'm not going to reach my 4stoneby2012 target, and also because of going away this weekend. Mr B and I are spending our anniversary in Rome, and I know we'll be eating, drinking and generally being merry, and the diet will go (even further) out of the window.

The plan is that I will get back to the gym and back on the diet when we get back.

Whether that happens or not remains to be seen...