The Hardest Thing

I think the hardest part of our TTC journey and inability (so far!) to get pregnant for me is the feeling that I'm letting people down. 

I constantly feel that I'm letting Mr B down - he could be a daddy by now if it weren't for me. 

But I often feel that we're letting other people down, too - our parents, our brothers, our extended family - by not having a baby yet. 

A couple of weeks ago, a friend of my mum's posted this on Facebook:

I always thought that my friends posting their pregnancy and birth announcements on Facebook was difficult, but this completely broke my heart.

I want MY mum to have baby cuddles with a grandchild. I want MY mum to spoil my children. And I want to make MY mum proud.

But most of all, I want MY mum to be this excited.

I want MY mum to be a Nanny.