After I chased the doctors about my referrals, I had a phone call from the receptionist.
"The doctor would like to see you about the letter she's received from the gyneacologist - can you make an appointment to come in?".
Part of me knew it was going to be a pointless appointment. I thought that she'd want to confirm that she'd sent the referral off to the dietician and see how I was feeling generally about going to the hospital.
I was partly right - it was pointless.
I was wrong to assume that she would've done ANYTHING about the referral.
It started off badly when, as I sat down, she said "So, what can I do for you today?".
I told her that I was there because I'd been told she wanted to see me about the letter she'd received.
So, she dutifully looked at the letter, muttered something about "dietician" and asked me where I wanted to go from here.
"Erm, well... the consultant said I'd be referred to a dietician...?"
"Yes," she said, "we could do that. Or you could have a 12 week referral to either Weight Watchers or Rosemary Conley. We could also look at Orlistat. And if none of that works, maybe we need to consider surgery".
To say I was confused by the direction the appointment was taking would be an understatement.
She proceeded to tell me that if I chose to see the dietician I would probably only see her once or twice.
I told her that I'd tried both Weight Watchers and Rosemary Conley before and had limited success, so maybe it would be worth me giving the dietician a try.
She asked me how losing weight was going, and when I told her it was something I've been trying to do for well, ever, she made a noise that suggested she didn't believe me.
I told her that I'd got an appointment with a personal trainer booked, and she looked at me as if she didn't believe me.
She then said "I think maybe you're complacent about dieting, and that's why you're not losing weight. I think you need to put some serious thought into weight loss surgery".
I asked if there was anything else she wanted to talk to me about, and she said no. I promptly left.
I was pretty fricking angry. So angry that I ended up crying.
WHY was weightloss surgery being offered so easily?
WHY was that my only option?
Surely it would be better - and cheaper - all round to offer me more support and guidance than an operation?
I'm now more determined than ever to do this myself - without medication OR surgery - so that I can stick two fingers up to the NHS and their "help".