11/04/2012

My own kinda funk

So yet again, it's been a while since I blogged.

I've been in a bit of a downward spiral of self pity since The Results came in. It's not been helped by the fact that I've spent a lot of time on my own as Mr B has been decorating his study. It meant that in the evenings and at the weekends I've been left with a lot of time to spare, hanging out in my own head, which is never a good thing!

I went for my day 21 progesterone test 2 and a half weeks ago. When I rang on the Friday for my results (purely out of curiousity) the receptionist told me that the Dr wanted to see me for a routine appointment to discuss the results.
This confused me a little, because my understanding had been that whatever the results were, my Dr was going to refer us (the actual test was more of box ticking exercise than anything else!). After a bit of an argument with the receptionist, I finally got to speak to a Dr about the results, and it turned out that MY Dr hadn't seen the results - it was another Dr that was requesting an appointment.  (If you've stuck with that, well done!)

ANYWAY, the long and short of the story is that I'm not ovulating. At least, I wasn't ovulating the day I had the blood test.

Although I've known for more than 10 years that I've got PCOS and my fertility was going to be an issue, it's all been much tougher than I thought it was going to be.

When we got the results from Mr B's SA, it was massively bittersweet for me. I was over the moon that everything was good for him, but felt like all the pressure was on me if we were going to have a baby.

Then, when we found out that I'm not ovulating (maybe), that felt like another slap in the face for me, too.

Like I said, I've had too much time in my own head with this stuff recently.

I'm on the up though, I promise ;-)

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